Who is a needy girl




















Skip to main content. Needy, clingy behavior is a clear sign that you lack confidence in your worth. Girl, you need realize your value as a woman! You feed his dog when he goes out of town. You ditch your girlfriends and you cancel your plans to go out with him at the last minute.

Solution: STOP selling yourself short! Ignore the tingling, throbbing, love-sick feelings that you experience about a new man.

Calling him will make you appear anxious. Anxious will make you appear needy. If you have to guess whether or not to call. You call, text and email him more than he contacts you. You concoct way to be with him; you invite him to a party and you cook dinner for him.

You keep his favorite beer or liquor on hand. You give him gifts, mail him cute cards or send flowers to his home of office yes, women to this! When you call and leave him a message or you text him, wait until he contacts you.

He could be busy or waiting for a reason or the right time to call. Ditch the syrupy greeting cards and ask him to pick a nice bottle of wine up before coming to your house. If you are indeed giving more than you receive, you are with the wrong guy.

You act out your apprehension. You constantly text him and call him. You drive by his house and you stalk him on Facebook. Your job is to be charming, receptive and appreciative of his pursuit.

Bombarding a man with texting and phone calls is the surest way to push him away. If you believe you ARE the prize, he will sense your confidence and self-worth and he will work double-time to win your favor. You hound him for affirmation.

You feel he is not fulfilling your relationship needs. You beg him to talk to you, reveal his intimate thoughts with you, spend more time with you and have sex with you.

Your behavior is smothering and suffocating, causing him to pull back from you to protect his personal space. Solution: Dating in hopes of a serious relationship is an unrewarding process.

Absence does make the heart grow fonder. Force yourself to give him space and create activities for yourself. Practice dating for the sake of entertainment and friendship.

Avoid this dark fate by not being needy. No really, you can do that by letting the relationship unfold organically. Oh ok, that's always a super specific pace that everyone in the universe follows, like not seeing a guy more than twice a week for the first month or two. Not answered: Can we eat after midnight? Must I wait four minutes to text back? Another Cosmo piece details four ways women "come off as too needy," and they include NOT asking for his approval , NOT relying on him for fun, NOT reading into his actions , and of course that old time-tested needy girl move, NOT gluing yourself to him.

But what gets me always about advice like this is that it never unpacks why women specifically might allegedly act this way in the first place. And more importantly, it sets the "correct" default behavior based on male preference for "less" interaction, and works back from there. In other words, guys don't talk a lot or ask a lot questions, so they hate when you do it, and when you do it, it's naturally going to seem like TOO much of that shit.

So let's stop being that way. Instead, you could look at how lack of trust is probably behind some of this stuff. Or that you would only read into a person's actions if they hadn't sufficiently explained them for you. Also, hello? Lack of trust can be a reason for neediness from anyone. Have a conversation about why. But back to Dr. Rebecca Kennedy. She asked her patients who talk about That Girl how to not be That Girl, and their answer was telling:.

Don't let the guy know that you want more than he wants. Ah yes. Never tip your hand in the game of love. Look, right here I will throw all comers a bone and admit that absolutely, yes, everyone likes a little game, a little mystery, a tiny bit of excitement in a relationship.

Also: Sometimes it's cool to be up front. Sometimes that can be its own thrill. The thrill of a relationship to me is not how long you both held out acting like badass Teflon robots. It's how well you connected and in what ways, and the adventure of finding those connections. That's the shit, morons! Also, I've never met someone who isn't needy on some level. Not even once. Not even kinda. Yes, it's certainly our job if we want to be more self-actualized people to try to work that shit out and be happy with ourselves, but the idea that we have to act like we don't need anyone when the whole reason you are getting with a person is cause you do , well, that is pure fucking farce.

Furthermore, a huge part of a healthy relationship is knowing what you need and owning it, and being able to state it clearly in actual sentences, not hope someone guesses while you are busy over there in the dark being a mysterious asshole.

It's obnoxious to date someone who can't stick up for themselves because it means they have no self-worth. Not having a life outside of your relationship puts a lot of pressure on your relationship and isn't a sign of a healthy relationship. But if every time you ask her to pick up after herself or tell her you need some space she assumes you'll break up with her, that's a red flag.

When you try to set boundaries in your relationship , how does she react? You should feel comfortable setting boundaries. A clingy girlfriend will lash out to needing space or time to decompress after a fight.

Yes, you should feel like you're able to be honest with your partner, but that doesn't mean you owe them the complete breakdown of your traumatic childhood. Develop your own hobbies and interests outside your relationship.

If you depend on other people for happiness so much that you can't be by yourself, it's time to look within. It's time to make your own decisions. If you depend on your partner's insight too much, try the lone wolf approach to decision-making. It's okay to make mistakes. Sometimes you make a bad decision, but you'll learn and grow from it.



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